What defines a Lady?
A lot of times we hear females being called different names; lady, woman, young lady, young woman, madam, girl, young girl…etc. So who then is a lady? Is it best to be referred to as a lady? What makes ‘a woman’ different from ‘a lady’? Is there really a difference or is it just ‘oyibo’? I mean, I have heard a couple of people argue that there really is no difference as all are just synonyms, an ‘Oyibo man’s way of confusing us’. But then, thanks to a level of growth and maturity, a lot of people now beg to differ on this as society has indeed taught us there is a huge difference.
Before you grab your dictionary and try to make sense of all this, let us first begin with defining a few of these words the way we really understand it..lol So here goes :
Woman – Looks like a ‘she’…curves and edges and all
Girl – Biologically has 2x chromosomes even though she doesn’t look like a woman yet, but would definitely grow to look like one.
Madam – This is well, without the ‘e’ so definitely not a French word but a Nigerian way of saying that lady is tough and definitely calls the shots in your life…so let’s just say it is more of a tittle.
Lady – A perfect blend of all of the above and more.
Now that we have established this basic definitions, do you now understand when I say ‘women are born, ladies are made’? Don’t worry, you really don’t have to agree as I would leave you to chew on that as I move on with those who seem to be on my page…*smiles* A lady never compromises on who she is even though when caught in the same situation, a woman would rather compromise as it suits her wants and pleasures. But then, taking a close look you can actually see that there is no such thing as ‘’better’’ where a lady and a woman is concerned. It all depends on who you want to be and what length you are willing to go to be who you want to be.
I mean, if all females are women, do you want to remain a woman? Just the way you were born? Acting the way you were taught to and going through all ‘’the woman’’ goes through, tackling each one as a woman should? Or would you want to step it up a notch, do a little more than the cliché that has become a woman? The real question here is what defines a lady? What really is the fuss about the lady and why does it seem to feel so good when ‘we’ are referred to as ladies? Someone said to me a while back that being a lady was about ‘Class’, another said it was all about ‘poise’ but in reality what is being a lady really about? Are these people actually correct to say it is all about class and poise?
The truth is, it is more about poise than class. What defines a lady is a reflection of what she stands for and believes in. what a lot of us call being a lady these days has nothing to do with what being a lady is truly about. The lines have been blurred, leaving us with a rather sloppy patchwork of unrealistic features, societal acceptance and of course social media.
So for those who really want to know, here is what really defines a lady;
- Her poise, grace, charisma, carriage, more like the aura she exudes.
- Her nature, who she is.
- Her beliefs, what she stands for and what she operates by.
- Her interaction with others (male and female).
- Self-control and how much she holds back even when she ought not to.
- When females think to drown the world in a pool of their jaw slacking sexuality, a lady knows that she is sexy anyway and so she dresses to with ease and not to please. Catch them in the same outfit and you would see that one seems effortlessly sexy while the other has all her efforts in your face.
- A lady is never afraid to speak her mind. She is confident but not loud. She knows that she doesn’t need a lot of friends to feel among but she is definitely there when you need her help with anything.
- She knows the clear difference between aiming to please and doing the right thing.
- She is quick to forgive and is intelligent.
- But don’t get it twisted, she definitely has a smart mouth too…one she uses wisely.
- she never writes people off. She sees the good in every one.
So yes, in lieu of letting the ‘WORLD GIRL CHILD DAY’ (which was yesterday by the way) go unnoticed, pass this on and make a difference!
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By Maureen Alasa.